Uranian Mermaid Looking for Love
If you are interested in learning about astrological compatibility between charts, it can help to explore LOTS of different charts and the relationship between them. This is called “synastry”. In my advice column for Sasstrology I answer questions about astrological love. Below is a letter from a “Uranian Mermaid”
“With a quick glance at my chart I’m sure you can tell that I often find it difficult to differentiate between fantasy and reality, particularly when it comes to men. Following a traumatic Pluto square Venus transit a few years ago in which I got married, pregnant, divorced, and filed for a restraining order in the space of a year, I have been slightly more cautious when it comes to men. Slightly. Nevertheless, I’m still getting myself into ridiculous amounts of trouble/scary sexual situations.
Lately I seem to be attracting the same kind of man/situation ad nauseum; unbearable sexual attraction, they seem so strong/reliable and yet they prove ultimately unavailable, often romantically, due to professional reasons or both. I’m sick of it. At this point in my life I really feel as though I need to focus on myself/my career/what I want out of life rather than obsess about relationships/men. Unfortunately, I feel hooked on this one guy who keeps appearing every time I feel I’m getting over him despite the fact that we live in a city with over a million people.
If he is interested he’s hiding it well, and I find it difficult to impossible to communicate with him (he seemed very interested to begin with, and there was a lot of emailing back and forth for a month or two, but then he went ice cold and has been extremely distant ever since). Basically laying eyes on him is enough to make me pass out… and lets leave it at that. Fact is, I really doubt it will ever lead anywhere due to his extremely cold behaviour. I would love it if you would tell me otherwise but I doubt you will (Please be brutally honest :-). What I would really like to know, is how I can snap out of it (if that’s even possible). I’m really really tired of falling for the wrong kind of guy who couldn’t care less again, and again, and again.”
Dear Uranian Mermaid,
Wow! I can certainly see the attraction between you and Mr. Taurus. With his Mars in Pisces conjunct your Venus in Pisces and activating your fifth house of romance, pleasure and sex, it’s no wonder you can’t resist the allure of this ambiguous lover. Not only have you two got plenty of sparks flying with the Venus/Mars conjunction, but his Sun and Mercury in Taurus light up your 7th house of partnership, making him seem like an ideal partner: stable, grounded, confident and dependable.
However, as you have already so wisely noted, this guy is not what he appears. Though he can appear sweet, gentle and caring due to the harmonious combination of his Taurus Sun and Mars in Pisces, there is much more to this story than meets the eye….
Mr. Taurus has Venus in Aries opposed by Pluto, which indicates that in his more unevolved state (which he appears to currently be sharing with you) he thrives – and I mean thrives – on power plays, manipulation and head games in relationships.
This is a guy who wants to conquer the object of his desire completely and then move on to new and more exciting challenges. Certainly if he works at it, he could form a stable and solid connection (Venus in Aries trine Saturn in Leo), but he’s completed his Saturn return already, so if he hasn’t settled down at this point, he may need a whole lot more tutoring in the school of Saturn’s hard knocks before he’s ready to commit to any one person.
But enough about him! Because what is really exciting about your current situation in love and romance is the transits you’re having to your natal Venus, which probably explain quite a bit of the upheaval you’ve recently experienced. Uranus and Saturn have both been activating your natal Venus for the last year and you’ve got about another six months to go in the company of this super duo, as they accelerate your growth and offering you tons of opportunities to shed old patterns and explore new territory in the real of love.
Since you have a natal Uranus/Venus square all of your own, this transit is mirroring some of your own possibly hidden needs for space, freedom, excitement and eccentricity in relationships. You may be attracting partners to you now that simply amplify some of your own needs that may have been repressed. This is a good time to try and embody the qualities of Uranus in relationship, asking yourself, “How weird, outside the box and revolutionary can I be in the realm of love and romance?” The more you yourself take on Uranian qualities (independence, freedom, uniqueness), the less you may need to encounter these in the partners you attract. On the other hand, if you simply decide to stick your head in the sand and sleep through this transit, you can; it just may make things a whole lot more difficult. Whatever you choose, transiting Uranus and Saturn part company from your Venus towards the end of this year, so plan on a new relationship chapter of your life starting around that time.
